Starfleet Proverb
by theinspired
Summary: One-shot. The Enterprise crew has just saved the world. Now, they begin their trek back to Earth. Scotty attends to his hunger.


James Tiberius Kirk, after ordering a direct course for Earth, was wandering around the labyrinth of hallways aboard the _U.S.S. Enterprise_. He ran the events of the last few days through his head repeatedly, still unable to believe that he had gone from cadet to first officer to captain in such a short amount of time. He was now the youngest Star fleet captain to date.

After a few minutes of aimless strolling, he found himself in the kitchen. But it wasn't empty as he'd expected it to be.

A table was filled with the most random assortment of plates and bowls and cups. They all contained some sort of sustenance. Everything from strawberries to smoked ham. At the far end of the table sat a very eager Scotsman, surveying the food spread out before him with a hunger in his eye.

"Scotty, what-" Kirk started, but he didn't get to finish.

"Don't touch anything!" Scotty warned through a bite of his BLT sandwich. "This is all mine!" He swallowed, suddenly developing an interest in the tabletop. "Er...Captain."

Kirk smiled at the last statement. "Don't worry about the title, Scotty." He pulled out a car opposite the engineer, settling himself into it. "It isn't technically official yet."

He nodded. "Aye." He took another healthy bite of his sandwich.

A bearable silence descended upon them. Kirk merely scanned over the vast variety of food carefully before reaching for a plate of vegetables.

"Oi!" Scotty exclaimed, throwing his arms up; causing a few chips to spill out of the bag he was holding. "What did I say about the food, eh?"

Kirk halted his movements, his hand still hovering in mid air. "You're seriously gonna eat those carrots?" He asked incredulously, raising an eyebrow.

He shrugged. "Why not? They improve your eyesight. And an engineer relies on that." He placed yet another potato chip in his mouth, crunching it out of existence.

Sighing, Kirk withdrew his hand, resting it on the table. "Do you really think you can eat _all_ of this? It must be... what? _Two months_ of rations? Three, maybe?"

Scotty set aside the empty chip bag and started on a bowl of fruit. "Dunno. I've been starving in that blasted base for so long I forgot what real food tasted like." He plopped a berry into his mouth. "You'll be lucky if there's even a _crumb_ left."

"You're very...um...protective of your food." Kirk observed, eyeing a chocolate muffin a few plates and bowls over to his right.

"I'm hungry. I want to eat all this. It's that simple, _Captain_." He said, using his title to mock him.

He scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably. "Well, then..." He mumbled as another silence filled the room. He stared longingly at the muffin.

Scotty, after he had finished off the bowl of fruit, noticed. Just to humor him, the engineer reached over and took the muffin from its plate, took a bite, and nodded appreciatively. "This is...good."

Crestfallen, Kirk sighed sadly, reaching for the plate of vegetables that had been in debate earlier. Scotty slapped his hand away.

"Hey!" He protested, waving his hand in the air in an effort to distill the pain. "What was that for?"

"I gave you fair warning." He took another bite of the muffin.

"Don't tease me then." Stubbornly, he grabbed a carrot from the plate and plopped it in his mouth before his counterpart could react.

Scotty opened his mouth to speak but thought better of it, clamping his mouth shut to simply glare at Kirk. A sly smile crossed his face in reply.

A few minutes later, Chekov's voice echoed through the kitchen. "We are on approach of Earth, Captain."

Never breaking his smug gaze with Scotty, he answered. "Thanks, Chekov. I'll be up in a minute."

"Aye, Captain." The Russian replied before ending the connection.

"Well, Scotty." Kirk said, standing from his chair. "I guess I'll see you around." He walked away but when he reached the door, he turned back around. Scotty was engrossed in his feast once again. "Scotty?"

The engineer's head shot up, his gaze immediately locking with the Captain's. "Aye?" He asked, his eyebrows raising slightly.

"Don't forget: captains need their eyesight too." He left before Scotty could have the chance to rebuttle.

Scotty frowned at the comment; then shrugged it off, shaking his head. "'Captains need their eyesight too.' What is that?" He asked to the air. He took a bite of the muffin, chewing thoughtfully. "A Starfleet Proverb?" He laughed at the absurdity of the statement. "A Starfleet Proverb...oh...that's good."


End file.
